Daydreaming

My sister and I bobbing in the huge surf - about 4 months ago now - at Makena Beach in Maui. That afternoon had some of the most memorable fun I've ever experienced. We nearly drowned from laughter and saltwater nasal cleansing. Those waves just could knock you over, suck you down, spit you up and roll you around til your bathing suit nearly fell off with the weight of sand inside it. It was ridiculous, exhilarating fun.


I can't help it. My mind keeps going back there. I've been thinking and thinking about all the places I could go, but in the end I really just want to go back to Hawaii. I have a list of basic requirements, and when I think about the real reasons for wanting this trip, it seems quite obvious.

1. Must be able to spend majority of every day outside. (Which means the climate must be comfortable enough - not too hot - for bike riding, hiking, etc. And it must feel safe enough for me to do all this by myself.) Firstly, Costa Rica and Panama are so equatorial that this is not guaranteed. It could be incredibly humid and hot... and the sun goes down around 5:30pm, making for relatively short play-time. Secondly, there are a lot of dangerous insects, snakes, animals etc. in Central America, and crime-wise, it simply is not as safe for a woman adventuring on her own.
   
2. Must have wireless internet, and be able to work 3-4 days a week from where I'm staying. This is obviously going to be more of a challenge in Central America. Awesome little beach bungalows (where I'd really want to stay) are out of the question. Also, I don't speak Spanish, so if I ran into any technical problems, or just needed basic assistance, I would be faced with a serious head-ache.
   
3. Must be able to rent musical equipment if desired. Same problem as above.
   
4. (Bonus) Friends should be able to visit. It's way cheaper and way easier to visit Hawaii, in pretty much every way.
5. (Bonus) Should have places where I can go to extend myself socially... a musical scene, where I could even play some gigs. Okay, I'd be stupid to say I couldn't find that in Costa Rica. But to be realistic, the socializing stuff is already a huge challenge. If I added to it a different culture, different language, I think I'd be biting off more than I can chew right now.

In summary, I don't want to overwhelm myself. I'm pretty freaked out by the idea of living somewhere else (even for just 2 months) alone, away from all family, friends, support etc. But I feel SO strongly that I need to do it and need to prove to myself that I won't die of loneliness or depression. (Yes, I fear this could happen even in Maui.) That in itself is the challenge for me... and so I've decided to cut myself some slack and allow everything else to be nice and easy. I'm not relocating to have a wild adventure, but to continue my life, and see if it feels any different in a different location. Field research. I just need to know! Besides, I want to go on wild Jungle adventures with a friend, not by myself. And S and I are scheming about a 30th-bday trip later this year, so I'm not worried about missing out on crazy exotic travels.

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