pre-show

Tonight I play a show in Toronto. This'll be the first time I've ever played my music in a different city. High time!
I don't feel too nervous - it will be a small and casual affair. But even so, I'm in that pre-performance zone that I always imagine is a bit like preparing for war. (If I may be so bold!)
I try to always imagine the worst case scenario... or maybe not the absolute worst case, but the realistic worst case scenario. Say: bad sound, can't hear myself properly, am distracted and screw up a bunch. Perhaps stumble in my heels. Maybe am overwhelmed by dry throat and have coughing fit. Maybe the clasp of my bra will pop open or I'll utter some horrible faux pas.
Can I live with that?
Yep. I've lived through it before. Many times. So, knowing I can handle the worst I'm ready to accept whatever goes down. (I think, I hope.)
I like to be clear about my intention before I perform, so I declare that my purpose this evening is to: Feel my feet on the floor, the ceiling above me, the space around me. Breathe low not high. Look straight out and trust my fingers, listen to my band, and just get high on the energy. Let whatever happens happen. Don't worry about the small things. Play for the one person in the room who will love the music. (Maybe there will be others.) Feel good in my body. Strong, upright, confident, poised, and not concerned - I repeat - not concerned with how anyone else looks or how anyone else thinks I look. This does not make or break anything; it's just practice and fun. Remember that it's an honour and a gift to have music to share, and I don't need to get anything back from the crowd if I'm enjoying my music and my band. Leave the ego at the door and play for Something Else.

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