big ideas in the bathtub

Awake at 5 again. Weird. A couple weeks ago I would have set my alarm for 6:30, and if I didn't I could easily have slept 10 hours each night. This waking up at 5 thing is something that happens to me in the summer. There's only one explanation: the blue light.
Ha! I really didn't have any faith in the thing when I bought it. (I'm talking about the SAD therapy lights that blast special blue-sky-like-rays at you.) But the day after I started using it, the lingering morning sleepiness just was gone. I woke up and jumped out of bed. Hmm.
So, whilst in the tub and drinking tea, my mind started throwing out big ideas. Now that the Hawaii big idea is reality, I need another idea to work on. I've just booked 2 shows and hopefully will have a 3rd, bigger show, confirmed soon. (This is for Nov/Dec.) Somehow the prospect of nobody coming to these shows doesn't bother me much. It just needs to be done, audience or no audience, before I go away. So the next challenge, obviously, is to book a tour. I think it will be something like Toronto/Guelph/Ottawa/Montreal/Quebec City. I like it over in those parts. I think it has to be late April/May. And somehow I have to find the money for travel, accommodation, food, and wages for the band. I've been acting lately as though money is no object, and it's catching up to me. Money really gets in the way of implementing big ideas. So that means it's time to start writing grants, and perhaps planning some fundraising events.
Hmm... sorry, this is boring blog material- I'm just thinking out loud...
Obviously, the bigger the crowds, the more cash for the band... I'm going to have to put myself out there and ask some people I know with big followings to let me open for them. I'll have to be shameless. Maybe Leonard Cohen will write me back and suggest it... ha ha.
Whoo-ee. I've got to watch every penny I spend... I've made the nerdiest excel spreadsheet with a detailed budget and I cannot stray. The money has been flying out in terrifying quantities in every direction. Travel and CD production alone is breaking me. And I've got a band to pay for next month, and a designer whom I've commissioned to make me a performance costume (hee hee), a web designer and photographer, and let's not forget therapy etc etc. Maybe I should do a penny-drive? But somehow I'm not worried. I've got that feeling of whooshing possibilities and I know that when that happens, things have a way of working out.
And you know what I think is helping me feel terrific? Steinbeck's East of Eden. I'm nearly done, and I wish it was 5 times longer. It is absolutely heart-rending reading. So, so, rich, and in the subtlest, clean and simple way. It has this potency that moves me - I am just totally caught in the profundity of it. It stays with me all day - this feeling of being involved in something worthwhile.

..